Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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