You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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