Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
There are leaves in my underwear?
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