check it out our google latitudes are spooning
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Randomize