I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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