I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize