you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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