Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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