its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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