quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
