hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
