Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I need to sanitize my soul.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
