Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry hawaiichic hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(940): View more from Texas

I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.

Fav 11 1037 4012
share tweet
(812): View more from Indiana

i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.

Fav 73 7888 1174
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(908): View more from New Jersey

Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.

Fav 21 1413 4178
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

sounds like you fell off the wagon.

(1-617): View more from Massachusetts

fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.

Fav 5 4629 1283
share tweet
(407): View more from Florida

he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse

Fav 160 11833 1550
share tweet
(647): View more from Ontario

Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville

Fav 13 3372 1280
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

As in ill only blow him next week

Fav 14 3348 1171
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+61): View more from Australia

I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me

Fav 1 50 20
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(727): View more from Florida

My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.

Fav 0 10 70
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT