my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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