he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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