Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It's shark week go big or go home
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
