I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
