i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
