I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
