Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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