Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Randomize
