She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
The ass gains better be worth it
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
