this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
