Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize