so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
