Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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