either way he was missing a nipple.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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