Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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