nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
