She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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