and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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