Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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