He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
