At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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