PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
