i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
