yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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