hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
