so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
