Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
