We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
