One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
