hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
