Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
