he wants to bone in the snuggie
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
