you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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