why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
