Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Randomize
