It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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