i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You need a sexual gate keeper
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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