We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
